Unpublished scoops

Dipped in Witriol
AJITH PILLAI 

The story of stories that go unpublished is nothing new in the media. Some of them fall into the category of scoops deliberately ignored --like the report recently filed on a soon to be launched campaign to ban ice creams in the country to make its consumption an “illicit and exciting activity.” The copy was deleted by the news editor of a Delhi-based paper known for his weakness for desserts.  Incidentally, he found the lead-in quote to the story “Ice cream is exquisite. What a pity it isn’t illegal” in bad taste despite it being a remark supposedly made by Voltaire at the Cafe Procope, the oldest literary coffeehouse in Paris. That aside, other exclusive efforts by eager reporters are also rendered extinct by their bosses who believe that inexperienced journalists should limit themselves to simplistic analysis of tweets sent by celebs on national issues or what’s on at the hot and happening concrete jungles aka malls that dot our cities.

Here then is the exclusive gist of some recent stories that did not make the grade. Included here are background notes on those who filed the reports and why they were not carried:

Should the Independence Day have been celebrated on July 30!

Now we all know that virtually every newspaper, magazine and TV channel has number crunchers-- those folks who swear by statistics and do all kind of confusing things by playing around with data. Well, last week some of them collectively applied their minds and exchanged facts and figures on e-mail to come up with the startling conclusion that Independence Day this year actually fell on July 30 and not August 15. No, they were not implying that Jawaharlal Nehru didn’t make his historic speech from the ramparts of the Red Fort on August 15, 1947. In fact, they are agreed that he indeed ushered in the big moment on that very date. But according to our number crunchers, in the very next year, I-Day should have been advanced by one day or at least six hours.

Rather confusing but here is their take: 1947 was a regular year that had 365 days. But 1948 had one day added allegedly because it was a leap year although there is no proof that a year can hop, skip and jump.  And since Independence there have been several leap years which have pushed back the “actual day” we became free from the British rule by 396 hours or approximately 17 days. To quote the report sent to several newspapers: “The concept of a leap year is based on the presumption that the standard year of 365 days is six hours shorter than the sidereal year (the time taken by the earth to complete one orbit of the sun). But our investigations have shown that one day is added every fourth year to the Gregorian calendar because of some old western conspiracy dating back to the 1500s. Moreover, according to the scientists, the earth is slowing down with each passing year (when the earth was formed, a day is estimated to have been 14 hours and not the 24 hours we have today.) This retardation of orbital speed has been further hit by the growing population, environmental factors as well as the International Olympic Committee’s 1967 ban on performance enhancing drugs.”

An accompanying graphic with the story shows how the “midnight hour” has been pushed back by 6 hours every year. It also looks at what would have happened if India had attained Independence on February 29, 1948. The nation would have had to wait for four years for the great day to appear on the calendar.

(The story was submitted to several newspapers including The Hindu, The Times of India, The Indian Express and the Hindustan Times which said it could consider carrying it after conducting a nationwide opinion poll. Others, including TV channels rejected it in national and international interest).

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TV anchors in battle fatigues

The story was scooped by a freelance journalist who caught TV anchors across the country donning battle gear and practising the art of rapid fire questioning of Pakistani troops across the LoC.  This exercise was undertaken after a survey showed that anchors should not only talk tough but also appear to act belligerent. The opinion poll also revealed that 89 per cent of respondents felt that displaying knowledge of hand to hand combat in TV studios will be a big plus and that on days when serious military issues are discussed, anchors dressed in olive green would set the mood for big fights.

While on the story, the reporter interviewed several anchors who found training in ground combat rather taxing given that they were free for lessons only after prime time.  The venue (in most cases deserted streets) chosen by managements trying to cut operational costs was a cause of concern since some of them were targeted by local gangs and could not retaliate. However, the presence of men and women in uniform led to newspaper reports of heightened security in several cities.

But there is a sense of pride in serving the nation among those participating in the training. “We are no doubt pooped at the end of the day. But when we slip into our fatigues we forget that we are fatigued because we know we are doing all this for two noble causes—national interest and TRP ratings. I’m just waiting to go to the LoC. The next border skirmish will be handled by us,” the report quotes an anchor. A TV network has even commissioned the designing of a new set for its prime time news programme called Line of No Control—a no-hold barred discussion and physical combat between participants from India and Pakistan with anchor joining in the action for special effect.

(Indian papers refused to carry the story fearing litigation. American publications rejected it despite being given photographs of star presenters in military gear and fake night vision glasses. Reason: “Embedded journalism is nothing new in the US. So the story lacks any shock or surprise value,” was the terse response from The New York Times).

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 Big job, same pay

A leak from the HR department of a prominent magazine was behind this story. Apparently, a novel scheme to keep staffers happy has been devised which ensures promotions but without any pay hike. The scheme has led to the creation of new job descriptions. According to the report filed by a journalist of an English daily with multiple editions, the new designations include junior chief reporter, assistant chief reporter, chief of chief reporter, sub-junior senior editor, junior senior editor, assistant senior editor, senior editor and  senor and senorita senior editor.

(The paper’s news editor rendered this exclusive report ex-clusive without taking a second look. He apparently didn’t wish to give other managements ideas).

Tell-tale piece

Speculation at the Delhi Press Club: Will Vinod Mehta do a Narayana Murthy to inject some zest into Outlook?